Dodge at My Old Kentucky Blog has put up a post featuring three of Minneapolis' best local acts right now... Vicious Vicious, The (Olympic) Hopefuls, who just got served papers by the US Olympic Committee and were told they had to drop "olympic" from their name- damn copyrights!-- and Kid Dakota. Check it out...

The Dog...

So... I decided to run over to Border's in Waikele this evening (no easy feat due to the Jeep's Death Wobble), and who did I see coming out of Jamba Juice? None other than the mullet wearing bounty hunter himself: Duane 'The Dog' Chapman. And, yes, he looks just as ridiculous in real life. This man is the epitome of celebrity for no apparent reason. I don't know how many of you have watched the show, but he gets way too preachy on the guys he apprehends. Plus... he and his crew wear these drop leg holsters made for 9mm hand-guns... but all they are allowed to carry is mace. God, that bugs me for some reason.
Anyway... "Yo, Dog!" I yell. "Eh, Bruddah... try no yell," he responds. And thus, I rubbed shoulders with celebrity (all be it really greasy, kinda stinky, definately in need of a VO5 treatment shoulders).

A Lil' Doughty for that Ass...

Since some of you keep calling to remind me that I missed seeing Mike Doughty for free at the Aquatennial in dntwn MPLS, here is a track to shut ya up for a few minutes. Besides, we have great bands out here all the time... like "The Capt. and Tenielle"... ooooh, and "Alien Ant Farm" next week. (note the sarcasm).

Mike Doughty ... "St. Louise Is Listening" (mp3)

An Open Letter to Axl Rose...

As found on McSweeney's ...

Attention, Mr. Axl Rose:We Did Not Feel Welcome in the Jungle.

Street Music...

Star Trib brings us snippets of some of the least heralded members of the Twin Cities' music scene...

check it out here

The Dude Abides...

Thats right, kids... this weekend is Lebowski Fest 2005. Break out the bowling balls and make your self a "Caucasian" (read: white russian). If you have no idea what this is about, you desperately need to make a run to Blockbuster...now!... do not pass GO!

DEATH WOBBLE...

Now... anyone who knows me, knows that I love my Jeep. We have a good relationship: I understand that some days she will be slow and sluggish, and she forgives me for using the cheap gas most of the time, and dropping empty soda bottles onto her floor boards. But, over the past few weeks, I've built up a lot of hate in my heart for my precious love... and I want a divorce!

You see, we've had some troubling times lately. I keep throwing money at her and buying her gifts (new sway bar links and bushings, a whole new front break system to include rotors, calipers, pads and steel lines). Still, she rejects me. All she does is throw the "DEATH WOBBLE" in my face... and it hurts.

"DEATH WOBBLE" is pretty easy to describe: it feels like the whole front end of your car is trying to rip itself apart from the rest of the vehicle. The tires jump and move like they are break dancing, the steering wheel shakes so violently that it feels like it wants to come off in your hands. The only way to end the "Death Wobble" is to slow down to a crawl. It sucks!

So, seeing as I have put in the new sway bar links and redone the front brake system, I think that the next stop is a new trac bar and a steering stabilizer. Hope that works... otherwise its off to the dealership for me, and a new home for my baby.

For more on "Death Wobble" look here... and here... and here...

Music Will Make It All Better...

"Bohemian Rhapsody" (Queen cover)... The Flaming Lips (buy it here)

"Hustle and Flow (It Ain't Over)" ... Terrence Howard (buy it here)

"Float On" (Modest Mouse cover) ... Ben Lee THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!

"Monkey" ... Low (buy it here) Kickin' ass from Duluth, MN.

Bringin' It Back One Mo' Time...

Seeing as she is in MPLS/STP for the filming of "Prarie Home Companion," i figured I would bring this one back out for another spin....

The Lohan Freestyle (aka Big Ass Titties)... ***Warning-- Most Likely Not Work Appropriate... Unless You Have A Truly Kick Ass Boss****

Some great MP3's up at Copy, Right? ... my favorite of which has to be Mickey Harte's version of "I Don't Want You Back." Can't stop listening to it! Check it out... always great covers at Copy, Right?!

Mickey Harte- "I Don't Want You Back" (Eamon cover)

The Pictures - "Milkshake" (Kellis cover)

UN-FRIGGIN'-BELIEVABLE...

...AND 1 FRIGGIN' MORON (me)

thanks to Casey for settin me straight...

***Lies and conspiracy theories removed to save me from further embarrassment***

Yer Boy Dusty Droppin' That Science...

Dust sent me this email today... thought it was pretty interesting. Not gonna totally geek out and buy a telescope tomorrow, or anything, but it would be neat to see.


Subject: THE RED PLANET
The Red Planet is about to be spectacular! This month and next, Earth is catching up with Mars in an encounter that will culminate in the closest approach between the two planets in recorded history. The next time Mars may come this close is in 2287. Due to the way Jupiter's gravity tugs on Mars and perturbs its orbit, astronomers can only be certain that Mars has not come this close to Earth in the Last 5,000 years, but it may be as long as 60,000 years before it happens again. The encounter will culminate on August 27th when Mars comes to within 34,649,589 miles of Earth and will be (next to the moon) the brightest object in the night sky. It will attain a magnitude of -2.9 and will appear 25.11 arc seconds wide. At a modest 75-power magnification Mars will look as large as the full moon to the naked eye. Mars will be easy to spot. At the beginning of August it will rise in the east at 10 pm and reach its azimuth at about 3 am. By the end of August when the two planets are closest, Mars will rise at nightfall and reach its highest point in the sky at 12:30 am. That's pretty convenient to see something that no human being has seen in recorded history. So, mark your calendar at the beginning of August to see Mars grow progressively brighter and brighter throughout the month. Share this with your children, grandchildren and friends. NO ONE ALIVE TODAY WILL EVER SEE THIS AGAIN

Happy 4th of July...

Hope everyone has a fun, and safe, 4th of July!!!

Play FREEBIRD!!!!

Don't be jealous that I will be spending my 4th of July rockin' out with Lynyrd Skynyrd. Thats right, the surving original members (outnumbered, of course, by the replacements) are bringing their roadshow to Oahu for the holiday. So what if its only about 1/3 of the original band... it beets a Skynyrd cover band any day of the week. Can't wait for "Gimme Three Steps," "Sweet Home," and, it goes without saying, "Freebird."

Here is Bayfest Hawaii's web-site if yer interested in checking it out.

150 Days to Go...

That's right, reached another milestone today... 150 days until I return to MPLS! Im sure some day, when I'm freezing my butt off in February I'll wonder why I was ever so anxious to leave Hawaii... but for now, I can't wait. So, this leaves me about 5 months to get all of the surfing, snorkeling and beach time in that I can get.

Mitches, congrats on the new house. I am excited to see it in person (but the photos look great). Dusty, tell Sue I said god job on finally making an honest man out of Rhino... thats awesome for those guys. Everyone else... have a fantastic 4th of July. Drink lots, be safe, and don't set off any M80's in your hand!

Benny's Theories on Life...

Got an email from my good buddy Benny Fox (aka Foxxy) today. He later noted that he was typing so frantically that there were many "typos" in his narrative, however I nearly pissed myself I was laughing so hard when I read it. Here is an excerpt from his new mission statement... watch out Jerry McGuire, there is a new memo in town...


Well man It has been some time since I have heard from you. Just checking to make sure your still kicking. Well I rounding the final stretch of mess I have got myself into. 14 more months go. And I have a plan oh yes sir I have a plan, going back to school, not NGCSU but somewhere gonna finish my degree in accounting. That much of my plan is certain after that theres a little grey area, Im gonna go ahead and call that grey area "life.” Oh I have come to a realization! Our 20s are the new mid-life crisis. I think about this all the time, I have no real clue where Im going in life and growing up you, when i say you i mean me and most everyone, assume were gonna do something great; cure cancer, be the next 5 star general, be the heir to hilton fortune, something but now I realize the end is inevitable, and by the end i mean working 40 hours a week in a job we hate going home to house full of misfits caused by our fucked up seed and mentoring, taking family vacations to disney land. Why I ask you because we are the .01% that all men fear, we are survivers. But I refuse, yes sir i said refuse, that the greatest accomplishment I can take credit for is finding my way thru a "unpregnantable" latex barrier. So I have to ask you what does it all mean, and how do people find there calling, is it hidden under some rock somewhere, is there some great scavenger hunt you get on your 30th birthday, or should i keep my cell phone on me at all times waiting for my "calling"..... Just a thought put to paper sir thats all. Also I have an intresting story for you, I was in the bathroom at an airport and I sat down on the shiter and i happened to glance to my right, I noticed writing on the partition of course, and I read some, I learned a lot about mankind that day, first of all who takes a sharpee to the craper with them, is that somthing that should go on the shopping list, milk, eggs, bread, cereal, and oh yeah a sharpee so i can finally get all that random stuff out of my mind while using a public shitter. Then I read some poems and I thoughts what the fuck is this I mean yeah I guess sometimes poems just come to you head while relieving yourself. But then what, what if its really good do you take partition to your publisher and say read this its good, the one right below the shitty finger print. And finally the mystery of all ages what is it about a public toilet that makes people want to express there racism, I hate niggers, I hate Jews, I mean really what is it, Well I was having a particularly witty day so I reached into my pocket and pulled out my sharpee(of course). And I decided the next person to sit down could at least have a laugh so I wrote the first thing that came to mind "I hate diabetics". So Id like to leave you with that!

Perpetually Fucked!
Foxxy